Excuse me, coming through. I’m Kazuma Kiryu, and I’m on my way to speak to some gruff yakuza lads about what their local gang war means for my orphanage. You can tell I’m serious because I’m riding a prototype segway dressed in nothing but a swimming cap, goggles and shorts. Now move, I’ve goons to beat up at two, photos to take at three, a biker gang war to resolve at four, and I also need to somehow fit in time to run around town waving my flip phone at strangers.
Once that’s done, I’m all good to head home to the kids I’ve left unattended. There’s no time to kick back, though. Vegetables must be planted, fish caught, bags sewed, and homework helped with.
