The open world dislikers bundle through the door of Dr Shrinko’s office like mardy harlequins, fuming and shrieking in their oversized licensed gear. One is wearing GTA 6 brand trousers so long they reach to her eyes. Another sports an Elden Ring hat that extends to his ankles. “Doctor, doctor!” they wail. “The open world games are too big. They consume all of our free time. Why, it takes Yasuke 40-100 hours to get from one end of Assassin’s Creed Shadows to the other!”
Dr Shrinko leans back in his chair with a pleasant smile. “Solution is simple,” he trills. “Make Yasuke 40-100 times larger.”

