Space Warlord Baby Trading Simulator lampoons stock market chaos

I’ve changed a lot throughout my life, but there’s one part of me that I’m positive will remain consistent until I die: I will never become a stock market guy. Don’t try to sway me. Nothing you can say will ever change this. You can call it a smart investment, but I call it gambling. Why would I bet my money on a bunch of companies run by people who have the power to make one stupid decision overnight that can wipe out entire fortunes? I’d rather become a Rock Paper Scissors hustler — sounds like a more financially stable strategy!